What is most Important to you from among the options
The Lord, in the Gita exhorts the seeker to surrender to Him exclusively. One may wonder as to why the Lord has put in such a harsh condition. When the father does not demand exclusive love to him, when the son shares his love with his spouse, mother and friends and similarly all others are fine with inclusive love, where each one may love others in an inclusive manner, why does the Lord demand exclusive surrender or exclusive love? This intrigues the common man. Why can’t the Lord also accept one in an inclusive manner?
The Lord says, “You are allowed to love me inclusively. I have only included just this condition that whoever you share my love with should be already purified beings. They should be a part of My family. Purified beings, who depend on me, are part of my family. If your father depends on me alone, you can love your biological father, because he is part of My family. If your father is not dependent on me and is worldly, who cares for his comfort, under those conditions your love for Me shall exclude your father. If your neighbor depends on Me and loves Me alone, then you can love Me along with your love for such a neighbor. If your father does not love me exclusively but your neighbor does, then you may love your neighbor but not your father. The rule of exclusivity only applies to impure beings who do not love me or surrender to Me. My family consists of my pure devotees and such devotees can love each other, with My permission. However impure beings are not part of My inner circle, even if they may be your direct biological parents or your spouse even.” This is the philosophy of the Lord. Exclusivity is only for worldly people but is not applied to beings who depend on the Lord, who love Him exclusively; Surrender to Him, to people who are busy discussing His pastimes, His abode, His divine qualities and His Holy names. The family of the Lord thus includes only pure devotees who have permission to mutually love each other. The reason for this condition is interesting.
When someone say, “A” loves another individual or jeev (जीव living entity) named “B”, who does not have genuine love in the heart for the Lord and is enamored by aversion and attachment to the forms in the world, the person “A” shall automatically follow “B” to the destination that “B” goes after death. Since “B” is impure because of his attachment to the world, depending on his Karma, he may go to some hellish planets or may take birth on earth in some unpleasant situation. “A” shall automatically follow through to the destination of “B” along with his load of Karma, to suffer along with “B”. “A” and “B” enter into a wed-lock of love in highly abhorrent conditions. Instead if “B” is a great devotee of the Lord and is highly spiritual but “A” is not spiritual but loves “B” for unknown reasons, without any expectations from “B”, “A” shall be automatically be blessed by the spiritual grace that follows “B”. If “B” is to enter the higher planetary systems or into the pleasant abode of the Lord, “A” shall follow that individual to that very abode, even if “A” has not even consciously loved the Lord. This is the grace that “A” shall receive automatically for having loved a devotee with “no ulterior motives”. This is the philosophy of loving the direct family of the Lord, which comprises of pure devotees. The philosophy of exclusive surrender is to teach man that love should be always directed towards divinity, which has no material trace and one should shun even one’s own direct blood-relatives if they are attached to matter or to materialistic ideas. If an individual takes a donkey body in his next life, his exclusive lover shall also take the donkey’s body in his next life, this is the theory of exclusive love, devotion.
King Bharath was a Paramahamsa, a Jnani (ज्ञानी Man of higher knowledge) of the highest order. He took to the renounced order of life, leaving his kingdom to the care of his son. He started living a life full of austerities. Once while taking a bath in the river, he found a pregnant deer who was trying to cross the river. The deer was panting for life, in a bad condition, having escaped an attack of a tiger. As the deer tried to jump the river, the baby tumbled out of the womb of the bleeding mother. The mother deer soon breathed her last. Now the baby deer, that fell, generated compassion in the heart of the renounced King Bharath. The Paramahamsa sage took the deer back to his hermitage and nursed it. The deer started prancing around in a few days’ time and became the object of the sage’s love and affection. Now the sage’s attention was fully with the baby deer. He would carry out his spiritual practice and ablutions without fail, but his heart was stuck to the deer. If the deer was away from his sight even for a few minutes, ripples of fear would run down his spine. He would become restless and not take a breath in peace unless the deer was around. This was the attachment that the king-sage developed, who was known for his dispassion, prior to the entry of the deer into his life. The baby deer grew up and one day on attaining maturity, simply left the sage. The sage was heart-broken and was unable to bear the pain of separation from the deer. On one such day the king went to have a bath and gave up his body due to suffering in separation from the deer. The sage, who was regarded for his renunciation, having renounced a very prosperous kingdom, having renounced all power and privileges, steadfast in devotion to the Lord, following spiritual practices of the highest order, died of separation from a deer. The King-sage Bharath, then went into the body of a deer on leaving the body of a sage. This was the condition of a soul that had love for another soul, who had an animal body. Owing to the sage-king’s emotions and consciousness transferred into the body of a deer, received the body of the deer. This is a famous tale from the Srimad Bhagavatham that explains the theory of attachment to a materialistic body.